What Gets Me Through A Trying Day
In my 20s, when asked what gets me through a trying day, the answer was the memories of a wander-filled life. Now in my 30s, while I still enjoy the wanders, it’s not enough to get me through trying times. Perhaps, it is age or the feeling that I have been there and done that. I’m not really sure.
I have been planning to repurpose this blog for the longest time as I don’t see myself writing about adventures as much. As a mom of 1, wander is possible, however, I no longer have the cravings for it.
Connecting to God was my “trying times pill” in this season. I never really thought that this time will come. When I was chasing wanders, it consumed me. There was never a weekend that I didn’t longed to be outdoors. There was so much to explore.
I have never been to much by people’s standard. However, the joy that I get from connecting to God has given me peace and satisfaction.
It must be true. I wish I’ve known in my 20s that I’m chasing the wrong pill towards happiness. I don’t have regrets though because while it doesn’t get me through trying times in my 30s, the wanders that I’ve had has become a mark of how blessed and favored my life has been. Thanks to the architect and creator of life!!!
So whether you are in your 20s or 30s or even 40s, chase whatever makes you happy. You do you. As a Christian, it will be right to chase God first and the rest shall be provided for. Find the path of focus towards our maker. No one really knows us better than the one who created us. Go to Him and seek out your purpose.
Easter Break 2022
When I knew about the 2-week Easter Break at the last week of March, I was sad. I can’t afford 9 days worth of unpaid leave. But now that I am halfway thru and was actually back at work today albeit on training, I just wished I took all the 9 days of rest. I had an awesome time since Monday especially starting Thursday when the husband left for his family’s clan reunion in Bantayan and our yaya’s easter break too.
Favored. Blessed. Lucky! I hesitated writing how blessed and eventful my days are without the husband and a help around cause it might sound bad. I appreciate how blessed I am for the support. However, I sometimes feel that we are too comfortable. Life has been boring already.
But the husband loves boring. He also sees the glass half-empty while I always see everything half-full. I love our contrast. However, the artist and the kid in me dies when we are together. My cup never overflows when he is around as every little blessing becomes just normal coincidences for him. We are on our mid-thirties and decided we are done changing each other. I pray that our daughter will take the best part of me and him.
The last four days has been the happiest that I have ever been. It felt so good to have the house all for Unyara and I. No work and other things to think of.
Maundy Thursday was dinner and sauna with two of my girl friends. The last time that we hang out was 2019. I had second thoughts of pushing through because it was raining hard. However, God was just awesome. It stopped raining when we went out for dinner. It only rained back when we were safely settled at home.
We were out everyday except Friday but the rain never really caught us outside. Going out alone with a 3 year old, using public utility on a rainy weekend seemed like a recipe for hassles. But we got around just fine.
Nothing was planned on Black Saturday so when I learned that one of my mommy bestie is staying at home too, I decided to take on a 10km commute. As taxi would be too comfortable and costly, we decided to just take it until the terminal. We rode a jeepney and a motorcycle to reached my bestie’s house. It was the best unplanned house visit ever. It was a long overdue much needed catchup. We have really grown so much but my heart is grateful on what we have become.
And because Easter Sunday was for swimming, I felt guilty for missing. Even if it’s just Unyara and I, we went swiming at a pool near our place. I never really thought it’s open but luckily, they have a mobile contact. When I called, they were open and very much available to cater. Since it’s just us, I was prepared to leave my things to the mercy of the good heavens but lo and behold, there was a paid locker for only Php100. I was teary-eyed when the bartender mentioned it. Now, I wonder if I am that transparent. Aside from the locker, we also found someone who will blow Unyara’s floater. I was thinking I’d blow it on my own as our pump is broken. Lol.The favor continues as when we are in the kiddie pool, since documenting is life, I brought my phone. As Unyara feels a little scared when she started, one kid volunteers to take her up to the slide while I took a video. One kid also mentioned to me that there’s water on the slide so I need to be careful of my phone. However, the forgetful me forgot about it. I don’t know if the life guard notice this thoughtless Mom holding a phone on the kiddie pool because all throughout the time that I was recording, the water didn’t fall. I only realized it after I keep my phone at the locker and decided to focus on swimming that the water started falling. Whew! And because it’s Sunday, there were long lines for the taxi but someone always manage to be drop off infront of us. Yay! After swimming, we even managed to eat at Parkmall. When we arrived and safely settled at home, the rains fall. My heart skipped with overwhelming gratitude. God is so good!!!
When You Realize That Narcissism is Different from Self-love
“Who told you that you were a narcissist?” This would probably be God’s question to me if I ran to him during that time when I thought I was a narcissist, just like Genesis 3:11 when He asked Eve after Adam and Eve hid from Him realizing they were naked. I wish I did that – ran to God when I labeled myself a narcissist. I never did. To be honest, I thought this is the first time that I am declaring I AM NOT A NARCISSIST.
My heart is grateful for the friend who shared the story of Ana Jalandoni on Facebook. After watching the two interviews and binge-watch Dr. Ramani’s articles on YouTube, I was just sad for even thinking I am still a narcissist. It is good to be reminded that I am healed from this self-sabotage. I can stop following Quora articles about it now and maybe remind my husband and friends to remind me about labeling myself negatively.
From the now-defunct blog, 30SomethingKring posted on 8/1/2016
Why I Proclaimed Myself A Narcissist?
I don’t know when I started calling myself a narcissist, but I always have a feeling of superiority over everyone. I was the first baby in the family. All attention was on me. And I loved it. But as I grow up and started going to school, I began to see how different I was from everyone else. I was often ridiculed for the color of my eyes (They are Hazel Brown like a cat’s eye) and for being short. We were very poor. My mom serviced my classmate’s mom’s nails for a living. I was inferior in social status. But instead of dwelling on what I lacked, I magnified what I have. I was pretty and intelligent – that’s all I have. So I made them my weapon of choice.
I studied harder than anyone. Fortify me mentally and look down on people who look down on me in social status. Bully first before getting bullied. They may be rich, but I am better in beauty and brain. All I have is myself. I didn’t have anything or anyone. So that’s maybe why I loved myself so much because, without which, I would have been nothing. Self-love was narcissism. That’s why I called myself such.
I took dressing up seriously. We were not rich so I had to be creative. We cannot afford branded ones but I realized that brands don’t make you look prettier. No matter what you wear just as long as it fits you, you can be anyone.
Intelligent with looks – that was all I had. And I thought narcissism was all about loving yourself. But after reading this post, it saddens me. I don’t have any intention of sabotaging anyone’s happiness. So from this day onward, I will not call myself a narcissist ever. I love myself, but that’s it. I believe that if you don’t love yourself first, no one will. EVER.
The two can be confusing, but the gauge is the motive behind everything that you do. Narcissists only care about themselves at the expense of others while self-lovers care about themselves and others. For that, my heart is clean and totally narcissist-free. Thank you, God, for the gift of wisdom!!!
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Lilang’s Payag, Liloan,Cebu
Third weekend in a row visiting far-flung restaurants in the mountains of Metro Cebu.
(1) Nanda Cafe
(3) Lilang’s Payag
This time, we were meeting up with a family we haven’t met since the pandemic started. Unyara had a wonderful time since she has an “Ate” to play with.
Waze led us to some sketchy narrow roads once again. Hahaha! It’s very straightforward if going thru Yati road though!
- Caption from the husband
Watch it at:
Read details or listen at: link.medium.com/Y3E1jKbSlob
Citylights Camp & Diner, Consolacion, Cebu
Date of Dine: March 6, 2022
The usual goto for dining with city views was Busay, Cebu for us until we tried Nanda, Cafe in Garing, Consolacion last February 24, 2022. Our first trip towards the mountains of Consolacion was via Consolacion. On this trip to Citylights Camp & Diner in Panoypoy, Consolacion, Cebu was via Pit-os, Talamban.
ON ROUTE
The road via Consolacion was way better than Pit-os. The only pro of taking that route is when you live in Pit-os or you have errands there and decided to dine with a view in Panoypoy. It was raining when we visited Golden Haven in Pit-os but the Lord was super awesome. When we arrived at the crossing going to Panoypoy, the rain was reduced to a drizzle so we proceeded. There was no shortage of prayer along the way though especially when we had to pass a creek.
Our car was a Suzuki Celerio hatchback. It is a small car so we are very picky on our travels for safety. Thankfully, God was with us along the way. Going to Panoypoy, the passenger seat had an alternate view of the cliff. I love mountain views but I hate the roads to the top. But I think the fear had been one of the reasons why I wanted to go especially when everytime we do, God just doesn’t fail to amaze me with what He can do through prayers!
ON FOOD
I love that the menu at Citylights was pinoy food. We spend 900+ for 3 pax and a toddler. We had sisig, canton, fish & native chicken tinola. I was expecting so-so food but they were actually good. Compared to Nanda Cafe which were burgers & ramen, dining at Citylights was surprisingly more satisfying.
SHOULD WE VISIT AGAIN?
Yes. We want to try camping there.
Php500 Happiness at Vaño Beach Resort
Cebu island is blessed with many beaches. Because of this natural blessing, the beaches in Lapu-Lapu City is our least pick. As a home to luxury resorts, we’d rather drive 4 hours to the South of Cebu rather than spending much for luxury resorts. However, things change for us in pandemic. Some luxury resorts have cut down their regular prices so we were able to experience some. Starting with the luxury resorts, Lapu-Lapu has become our nearest pick for beaches now.
To celebrate the long weekend and to satisfy our little one’s beach craving, we decided to check the low cost beaches in Lapu-Lapu City. As we have limited knowledge for those beaches aside from the ones that has been my favorite during my college years like Blue Reef and Portofino (now Newtown), we decided to ask our friends who live on the island. We got Katano, Buyong and Vaño. As we were already heading to Vaño, we proceeded.
What We Thought About Vaño Beach?
As a family, we have managed expectations on low cost resorts. We were only there for the beach and I was satisfied. The resort is still recovering from typhoon Odette. New cottages are being constructed. Hopefully when it’s done, the beach will be cleared with debris like the big root and roof remnants. The comfort room and shower needs tending too.
What I like about the resort is they have the option to park outside. We were told about the Php200 parking fee inside before going in so we decided to park outside. We only paid Php20.
How Much Did We Spend?
Php20 Toll Fee
Php150 Entrance Fee (Php50/Adult)
Php350 Cottage Fee (Php500/cottage less the entrance)
Php20 Outside Parking Fee
Total: Php540
Would We Visit Again?
Yes. From our experience, we were curious of other cheap beaches around the island. Happiness doesn’t have to be expensive all the time.
Dining with a View at Nanda Cafe
It’s a 4-day weekend starting Thursday, February 24. Our schedule was just open for anything. Spontaneous and impromptu trips has become our thing since the pandemic started in March 2020. We open our long weekend with dining on the top of Garing, Consolacion! We were having 2nd thoughts of pushing through it because it looks like it was about to rain. We prayed and went anyway. God didn’t disappoint. Another blessed trip like our impromptu picnic in Sugbu Mercado Ayala. It’s just the 3 of us on this trip too. We left Ate Lanie (our househelp) at home to rest.
How’s your week so far? Here’s to praying you get to visit places with views too. Cheers!
Wedding Godparents At Our 30s? What do you think?
While we were one of maybe not too many who selected our wedding Godparents by the friendship and level of comfort back in 2015, I never thought we would have the same position this year. It is truly an honor to mark our 7th year of marriage by becoming wedding Godparents together. Grateful to the Sabordos for the honor. Praying for God’s guidance all the way!
Per Kasal.com, the typical Filipino wedding is characterized by the long line-up of ninongs and ninangs or the godparents. Their names appear in the invitation under the heading “principal sponsors.” According to Rita Neri’s The Essential Wedding Workbook for the Filipina, “ninongs and ninangs are senior men and women, preferably married, who are either family members or close friends of the couple’s parents.”
I have put emphasis on SENIOR because that’s what we obviously lack although we were not friends with the couple’s parents too but the couple. I truly admire the couple for breaking norms as well. When we decided for our “Principal Sponsors” in 2015, we were in a bind. There was a lengthy discussion how I preferred not to have anyone who would only be there because of their status. I wanted our principal sponsor to be couple we can reach out if we really need help on our marriage. For me, that’s what Godparenting should be. Despite the weirdness of having to ask 2 of our couple friends and 1 couple from our relatives who were young to be principal sponsors, we did.
7 years from that stepping out of the normal wedding norms, I just realized the benefit of what we have done. Godparenting a wedding should be done with care and not be tied with age.
For us, aside from the comfort preference, I don’t really have people who were my parent’s close friends. Now that I’m thinking about this, I can’t help but fast forward 25 years into the future when my 3 year old toddler will get to have the same choice. I will not pressure her into marriage of course, this is just hypothetical if she decides. It would be actually nice if one if not all of her wedding Godparents are her Christening’s Godparents too. But then again, it’s all up to Unyara to decide. Thinking about things like these makes me want to time travel. I’m very fascinated with growing old and spending it with the same people that I have now.
Godparenting a wedding on your 30s, compared to having it on your 60s does have some weirdness to it but not quite. It truly is an honor to be considered one. I’m truly blessed. Having it on our 7th wedding anniversary year make it more special as 7 is my favorite number.
7 might be short in marriage years but the hardwork to keep a marriage alive for 2 different people who are polar opposites in so many ways is worth noting. We may not have the age but the experience, I think we have a little. When we have God, the little things that we have will become big in His hands. If God is with us, then all is well even this Godparenting too. Right? What do you think?
It’s the 7th Sunday of 2022 But Still Stuck at “Clean Up”
2022 started into a “social” overhaul. I was so consumed with extending the konmari way into my digital world. It’s the 7th Sunday of 2022 and I’m still not done yet. Each Sunday, I would think of something to remove. I thought it’s all just “konmari” until I heard this “message” today. I forgot if I have listened to this when it aired last November 21, 2021. Somehow, it feels like I just heard it now. The feeling is so strong that the Lord wanted me to hear this today specifically. God knows that I’m more receptive to this message today as compared to how I am 2 months ago.
Having 2nd Thoughts of Continuing The Cleanup
Some days when thoughts bubble up, I would have the urge to share. My mind is occupied how the idea and the lessons could have helped my social circle. Then I would remember that I have decided to not share every little happenings of my life in the “clouds” already. My intention to share is good but I had no control over what other people think. Maturity has made me look at the way I have been carrying myself before. Most of the time, memories would made me cringed at my foolishness and immaturity. Social media has filled a void that should have been fixed at the root. Being able to share how “good” my life has been made me blind to the things that’s needed to be fixed. It took a while and a lot of conversations with God and stuffing myself with His words to come at a point of acceptance. Yet some days, I still go back to “this person”.
Bathing The Soul Should Be Done Everyday
Like how we bath our physical body each day, bathing our soul should be done everyday too. I am not wondering anymore why after almost 3 months, I’m still not done with “cleanup” yet. While I connected to God everyday, I only had enough to make it through the day. My connection to Him is only a vitamins to my soul. It’s a preventive measure. However, since my soul has been filthy and I had a “soul sickness”, the vitamins didn’t reach that part.
When You Have A Soul Sickness
Just like a physical illness like the common high blood pressure, diabetes and heart enlargement where at a point, we drink medicine to keep going. When we have soul sickness, we should be drinking medicine too. However, since this illness is not noticeable and can be hard to diagnose, most of us only realize it at a point of despair.
Knowing that you have a soul sickness can be hard but there was one thought that really make sense from our Pastor’s message. Check if you have a stinking attitude.
Let’s Clean Up
Each week, new ideas as to how I could clean up the clutter on my digital footprint comes up. The big vision is to have less social prints as possible when I search my name in Google.
Cleaning up my own clutter is hard but the exercise has really helped me to be intentional of what I will be sharing from now on.
The WANDER (FULL) LIFE 